Monday, January 7, 2008

WFT ??$*&$&#^%#&$ I'm Speachless

Have you ever run across a listing that just leaves ya speachless?

This one did, I was laughing so hard I shot Scotch out my nose (and let me tell ya, that does not feel good!). Now it's not just the price, but it's laughable too. It's the home itself. The poor realtor does his best with a description right out of "The realtor's how to write a listing" book. Check this out...

9849 Farmington ST Oak Hills, CA 92344
"This truly unique 2 story estate is a treasure amid the rolling hills of the summit estates. Charming details lovingly adorn this home from corner to corner with a daring, yet culturally artistic style. Come visit this personaluty enriched home today."

Unique.....check, yup it's not every day you find a house with a bright green roof.
Treasure...Hmmm, I don't know, it's rare and all but a treasure might be reaching a bit.
Charming Details.... Check, those are obviously the little houses on the wall of the stairs
Daring...Double Check, Painting your kitchen fire engine red and topping it off with black counters in "Monster House" daring.
Culturally Artistic.... I don't think so, unless you are into Christo or some other wackjob that likes to wrap islands in pink plastic wrap
Personaluty?.... (We have our require realtor misspelling). Check, I guess. It does have personality, but then again so does Charles Manson. It's just not a good personality.

Where, pray tell do you even find roof tiles that color? I hope for the sake of all that is good that he painted those and there isn't actually a company making Kermit Green roof tiles.



The red freakin cabinets would have been bad enough on their own. We must however give him 20 bonus points for the rust colored tiles. That is a combo I could not have imagined in my wildest nightmares.

What happened here, this wall color is actually quite normal. No problem, just put up a crap-load of little wooden houses.

Sorry, about this post.........Way too much scotch tonight.

13 comments:

BottomFisher said...

A Leprechaun halfway house?

MotivatedRenter said...

The roof makes it look like a lego house. I wonder if you can stack them?

Is the kitchen maybe going for the British Pub theme? Whatever it is, it is fugly.

someone said...

OMG! First thing that came to me when I saw the green roof and orange colored walls is that we have found where the oompa loompa lives.

FairEconomist said...

I used a clubhouse with cobalt blue tiles when I was a kid and it looked quite nice. I'm sure that on the right place the green tiles would be interesting and good. But OMG, not here! The owner must have been color-blind to have so many hideous mismatches, and I mean that literally.

Don't you sympathize with the realtor who had to write up a positive description of this?

PS Always avert eyes when tipping liquid to face!

FairEconomist said...

You didn't mention the price! 305K in 12/2003. 599K today! The owner thinks the decor makes this a superhouse!

Anonymous said...

I've seen worse. Red is a strong color that some like in Asian style and French style decorating. I think all of those houses on the staircase might be CA Missions? Too cluttered!! At least you can tell which home is yours from the sea of neutral stucco just look for the green roof. Good luck to the seller, I know from all of those HGTV shows very personalized homes are difficult to sell unless you happen upon a buyer with the same taste.

Anonymous said...

Beleive it or not, there are actually several homes in this tract with green roofs. The others however are a more subtle grean/blue color and all of those are on white homes. Those ones actually look pretty decent.

Rob Dawg said...

The Valyermo plaques on the stairs go from $20-$60 each. Made by monks a mere 20 miles to the west of this house it is a local thing.

Buttermonkey said...

Oh my. That house is...interesting. I'm assuming that is the Oak Hills in the high desert (aka armpit of the world). I lived up there for 3 loooooooong years and was thrilled to escape. $599,000? I wouldn't move up there again if that house cost $59.

colleeeeen said...

hmmm, good-sized lot... hmmm, i like red... rust-colored floors can be replaced... funny little houses can be removed... what, it's in the fricking high desert? they want WHAT for it? oh %$#@&! nevermind...

Anonymous said...

That house is friggin awesome.

ice weasel said...

Where's the Beanie Baby collection and does it come with the house?

And holy hell, I give them credit, you've got huge balls to think you can double your money in 2008. Good luck with that.

Anonymous said...

If you think that was bad check out this kitchen! I don't even know how to clasify this one and I watch decorating shows all of the time. Is it El Torito kitchen nightmare? Shoot out at the OK kitchen corral? Who does this?
http://www.ziprealty.com/buy_a_home/logged_in/search/home_detail.jsp?listing_num=T07151217&page=16&property_type=SFR&mls=mls_so_cal&cKey=b7437nwg&source=MRMLS